Today is an important day… Today, it’s very special.
After today, our life can change dramatically! (I’m sorry, details will be published only when all surrounding fog is gone and the visibility is better!)
I woke up at around 6:30 this morning. Last night, I had decided to give a second chance to being a non-smoker as of 10:30. The crave hit me very early, it would have been a very normal morning (mmhhh, not so sure) if I had not decided “to be clean”. I would for sure wake up early again due to the importance of the day, but the feeling would have been different than a crave.
My husband was stressed, me too… He was angry with the laundry items we received yesterday (I guess about the folding style), I was angry that he had started the day already angry. I didn’t say anything to him, I knew anything could easily make him angry today, I knew everything was too much for him today… I didn’t get up until 8:30, then had my mint tea (this tea love has only started 3 days ago, we were a “coffee addicted” family until then). I checked my e-mails and online newspaper. There were only two things in my mind when I went into the shower: 1. Cigarettes, 2. Currently hidden soon to be published subject…
I left the house at 10:50. I left the house very angry. How could my husband get angry with a co-worker in the meeting and talk about it with me just 10 minutes before “the important thing” today instead of focusing only on himself and getting ready for it?
I found myself infront of the kiosk. It was not the right day to re-start “cleaning”. I bought one pack.
The plan was first going to Usce, to eat something. It was too hot, very disturbingly hot for a morning walk ; I changed my mind and turned left as I saw an empty bench under the shadow. When I came closer to the small park area, the first bench was occupied by a couple. The second was occupied by the Serbian guy I fell in love with…
I’m not sure about the correct English word for it, is it “winebibber”? This was one of the options what I got on the online dictionary when I searched for “şarapçı“. Not in the meaning of selling wine, it’s spending your day being drunkard of wine.
If you’ve ever visited Istanbul, especially Taksim area in the evening, you may easily find them hanging around, especially next to the parks or traffic lights usually with their wine bottles in hand. They’re mostly not very frightening when you don’t count how their attire look like. When you see the wine bottle close to them, don’t worry: some would sing, some would curse, some would say something that you would not understand, some would read a poem and some would come next to you to make a joke. If the bottle is not around, then the party is starting: they most probably come next to you to ask for some money. A few of them may also make you a bit frightened (I remember one night, when we were still in Istanbul coming back home with my (now) husband (then boyfriend) after some drinks outside; while we were trying to cross the street by the traffic lights, one of them coming towards us and very insistent on stepping in front of where we were doing so, 4-5 times he tried, then it was over, but I felt my heart was beating quite fast due to the strong “grape” smell I had in my nose)…
The guy I fell in love today had his small bottle of wine (red and cheap of course) and a big plastic bottle of water settled next to him. Normally if I would see a winebibber sitting/daydreaming on a bench in Istanbul, I would somehow have doubts to take my seat close to him.
This guy was different. Although he had exactly the same attire like the ones in Istanbul, a bit dirty and old. His beard and hair were also looking the same (like Dionysus – their role model, Greek God of Wine – although he is mostly interpreted in a more feminine way): messy! He somehow gave me enough comfort that I could easily sit around and calm down… He was looking so “classy”.
An old guy suddenly showed up in the park area, he stopped next to my love and started to talk with him, then my love’s chat should have been captivating that the old guy also sat with him.
It was one of the “rarely happening moments” I thought that speaking Serbian would have been good. I would have joined their conversation.
I finished my two “poison sticks” consecutively. I was not angry anymore. Just when I stood up to take my way to Usce, my mobile rang. My husband asked me to be at home with him while “the important thing” would happen. I said “OK!”.
I left my love and the old guy still chatting in the park…